And sometimes we call it Bog...

[Note: The following history is fully unauthorized and only quasi-sane. Resemblance to anything objectionable is purely coincidental, unless its true. As always, other members of the Bog are not to blame, unless they want to be...)

Born of murky origins, the group writing experience known as Bog burst forth upon the blogosphere fully formed, though not necessarily fully coherent. It was only a matter of time before it took over the universe. Some point to its shocking 100 million follower benchmark as the flash point for its shocking influence upon pop culture and society as we know it. Other cite the members' appearance on Oprah tauting the printed version of their work Bog: You Know You Want It. In this much-analysed appearance the queen of daytime tried to woo The Pidgin Pen over to Harpo in a Yoko-style attack. Her bid to usurp his power was unsuccessful and resulted in the group developing their own talk show, Welcome to the Bog, as a tool to disseminate world peace. Side projects parked each member permanently on the New York Times Bestseller list, made their front row appearance at the Oscars an annual occurrence, and, of course, we need not go into the unfortunate uproar at the Grammies. Unsubstantiated rumours of wild bacchanalian parties and stints at various rehab facilities swirled among the success, born (mostly) of jealousy and those hoping to ride the coat tales of talent. But through all the highs and lows, each cited the Bog as the method of maintaining their sanity in the midst of insane success.

Many have tried to emulate the Bog's victory over all things not nice with little success. In an attempt to deflate the niche industry of tell-alls and exposes that has developed over the years, I offer forth the following Proustian Questionnaire. Our followers are hungry for scraps, so throw 'em a few answers if you are in the mood. (Mental note: Invite some followers.) Those of you who have already answered a few for Vanity Fair may want to choose new ones. Members are welcome to participate or opt out as their soul guides them, and, as always, to make up questions and answers they like better than the truth. However, in the spirit of keeping the mystery alive, please do not reveal simply everything, thus pandering to the culture of self-exposure and voyeurism that surrounds us. If we don't leave something for Kitty Kelly to make up she won't write the book, guys.

Love,

Eve (of Destruction?)

WHAT IS YOUR CURRENT STATE OF MIND?

Tenuous

WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE OCCUPATION?(WAY OF SPENDING TIME)

Propagating world peace. That or painting my toenails and watching Anthony Bourdain.

WHAT IS YOUR GREATEST FEAR?

Fear.

WHAT HISTORICAL FIGURE DO YOU MOST IDENTIFY WITH?

Marie Antoinette and the Apostle Paul

WHICH LIVING PERSON DO YOU MOST ADMIRE?

Ma mere

WHO IS YOUR FAVORITE FICTIONAL HERO?

The Bionic Woman

WHO ARE YOUR REAL-LIFE HEROES?

They go nameless

WHAT IS YOUR MOST TREASURED POSSESSION?

Love

WHEN AND WHERE WERE YOU HAPPIEST?

I'm hoping it hasn't already happened...shit, did I miss it?

WHAT IS YOUR MOST OBVIOUS CHARACTERISTIC?

B.S.

WHAT IS THE TRAIT YOU MOST DEPLORE (HATE) IN YOURSELF?

Lack of faith

WHAT IS THE TRAIT YOU MOST DEPLORE IN OTHERS?

Poo-poo-headedness

WHAT IS YOUR GREATEST EXTRAVAGANCE?

Tasty items

WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE JOURNEY?

The drive to the bank. The armored truck doesn't deliver.

WHAT DO YOU MOST DISLIKE ABOUT YOUR APPEARANCE?

Yeah, right.

WHAT DO YOU CONSIDER THE MOST OVER-RATED VIRTUE?

Virtuousness that becomes sanctimoniousness

ON WHAT OCCASION DO YOU LIE?

Wouldn't you like to know?

WHICH WORDS OR PHRASES DO YOU MOST OVER-USE?

The four letter ones...

IF YOU COULD CHANGE ONE THING ABOUT YOURSELF, WHAT WOULD IT BE?

You mean besides superpowers? Add a tail. (Thanks, Craig.)

WHAT DO YOU CONSIDER YOUR GREATEST ACHIEVEMENT?

Bog, of course.

WHERE WOULD YOU LIKE TO LIVE?

Earth

WHAT IS THE QUALITY YOU MOST ADMIRE IN A MAN?

Good humor and a good heart.

WHAT IS THE QUALITY YOU MOST ADMIRE IN A WOMAN?

Tact.

WHAT IS IT YOU MOST DISLIKE?

Not-nice stuff

WHAT DO YOU VALUE MOST IN YOUR FRIENDS?

Friendliness. And a wicked-cool sound system.

HOW WOULD YOU LIKE TO DIE?

Forgiven for everything...

IF YOU WERE TO DIE AND COME BACK AS A PERSON OR AN ANIMAL, WHAT DO YOU THINK IT WOULD BE?

Seriously, I have to do it again?

IF YOU COULD CHOOSE AN OBJECT TO COME BACK AS, WHAT WOULD YOU CHOOSE?

The violin of a virtuoso. Play me baby...

WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO (WORDS YOU LIVE BY OR THAT MEAN A LOT TO YOU)?

Cut 'em a break and hope like hell they do the same for you.

WHO HAS BEEN THE GREATEST INFLUENCE ON YOU?

Not so easily influenced.

(Ok, so forgive me for answering them all...for some reason I found talking about myself to be inordinately entertaining. Go figure. The bog thanks you for your patience.)